why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
We bought a hamster while completely stoned and 2 hours later returned it because your mother wouldnt let you bring it in her house. You cried. a lot.
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
Randomize
