She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
rest in peace liver.
It was nice having you occupy space in my body that could be holding beer n chicken.
that's going in my livers obituary.
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
I just thought I should tell you that I always know what you are doing. Everywhere. Every time. -Your loving Mother
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