I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
I just used a gift card from my in-laws to buy their daughter a vibrator. What even are morals?
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
Randomize
