I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
I may wear a condom to jerk-off tomorrow knowing that my hand has touched surfaces in this bar.
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
You're not talking any sense into me. You're cheering me on to disaster.
... is that not half the reason I'm your best friend in the first place?
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
Randomize
