Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
the intervention consisted of my aunt taking me to chuck-e-cheezs and telling me that this was my future - either as a mom or as a waitress - unless i stopped fucking around.
did she buy you pizza?
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
Come back. Shots need mouths.
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
Randomize
