Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
My new dentist just kinda stared at me when I told him that I used to have partial dentures after breaking 2 teeth while beating the shit out of someone, until I puked them into the toilet and flushed them after getting high and making myself undercooked mac and cheese.
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
Randomize
