She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
she looked like the before picture.
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
Randomize
