idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
he said I was the best sex he's ever had, handed me a burger king crown and told me to take my walk of shame with pride
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
Randomize
