I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
I found a video of myself completely naked on my phone giving a drunk tutorial on how to shit properly while blindfolded. Did you record it?
WHY IS THERE NO EMOJI FOR "FUCK MY MOM JUST SAW MY SEX BRUISES?!"
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
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