So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
I woke up with a random mailbox in my room with a note that said "this should probably be returned. Happy Thursday!"
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
Absolute soulmates or functional alcoholics?
Can't be the first without the last
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
He? As in you personified your dick?
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
Randomize
