but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
In line at the grocery store. The girl ahead of me is in a wetsuit and just bought 3 cases of beer and a bottle of vodka. I want to go where she's going...
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
Randomize
