i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
He better not be in your backpack
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
A 5 day bender that ended with refusing to pay my bar tab before I left the city. I offered to send them a selfie so they knew to never let me back in.
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
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