hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
I IMAGINED YOU YELLING SURPRISE WITH JAZZ HANDS. AND I LOVE YOU FOREVER
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
Thank you for deleting me from Instagram. Also, I'm carrying your child. Happy new year!
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
There is no way to say this. Dude, I peed your bed. No questions, no answers. My flight leaves in 30 minutes. Use my detergent. Also, THE VODKA IN THE FRIDGE IS YOURS.
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
Randomize
