I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
I didn't notice because vodka
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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