I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
