she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
Randomize
