just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
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