He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
There is nothing wrong with watching parks and rec all day then getting blackout drunk by night
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
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