i'm pretty sure the devil's penis is california-shaped
She announced her abortion via fbk
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
Randomize
