Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
I just had a 30 minute fake cell phone conversation with myself just to avoid hooking up with the drunk guy next to me. its like an art form.
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
My masturbation fantasy just had a wedding theme. I need new hobbies.
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
Randomize
