yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
I feel like strippers are like dogs, the more you show you're terrified the faster they come at you.
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.�
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
I jizzed in his mayonnaise and put it back in the fridge. Shouldn't have stolen my weed.
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
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