just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
FYI the landlord called and plumbers will be tearing up the bathroom tomorrow. Apparently the tub is leaking into the apt below us so be sure to pee in the shower today.
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
this whole "benign brain tumor" is truly a blessing in disguise. I almost want to start bringing MRIs to the bar because sympathy pussy is flowing like the nile
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
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