You can't motorboat a personality
two words: fractured penis. two more: emergency room.
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
Randomize
