That chick was all over your bacon last night, grinding on you, I thought you were going to bang her in the club
Dude it was a lap dance
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
I was trying to remember why my knees hurt then I remembered I was twerking on the countertops.
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
Randomize
