I need a shot of tequila, and quick death
yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
Randomize
