Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
We're too lazy to do dishes, so we're making sangria in a flower vase.
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
Have to get circumcised. Doctor goes, "On the bright side, you can tell people your dick is too wide."
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
My dad just said "fuck circus"
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
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