she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
I want to leave work and go home and eat Five Guys and masturbate
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
So far I've taken two naps, went out and bought a pizza called the Hipster, and in 15 min I'm gonna make a snow angel. Conquering Snowlandia. How bout you?
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
Randomize
