Texts From Last Night · mrsdean1087's Favorites

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mrsdean1087's Favorites Texts:

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(408): View more from California

My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.

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(214): View more from Texas

I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.

Fav 12 1352 705
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(402): View more from Nebraska

Fuck you for setting me up with the guy from the Nickelback cover band

(312): View more from Illinois

Payback for not stopping me from fucking the guy in the wookie costume

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(+97): View more from

Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.

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(843): View more from South Carolina

What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.

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(618): View more from Illinois

Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.

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(219): View more from Indiana

I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.

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(631): View more from New York

when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.

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