Texts From Last Night · sick1200's Favorites

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sick1200's Favorites Texts:

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(705): View more from Ontario

Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.

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(412): View more from Pennsylvania

Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve

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(225): View more from Louisiana

we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table

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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

Hung over does not do it justice. I am hung like a horse over. I am hungover and over and over. I am hung, drawn and quartered fucking over. They just told me I can't keep my sunglasses on in the office. Fuck drinking with you people.

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(256): View more from Alabama

We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.

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(561): View more from Florida

Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed

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(410): View more from Maryland

Theres a handprint of sauce on my frig, one streaked across my face, a trail of it to my bedroom and sauce all in my bed and i have no idea what the fuck i ate.

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(456): View more from

Theres a live mouse in the toilet. Goddamn you this is why I don't party here

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